Carol and Jeremiah

The week Jeremiah arrived was a devastating one. I found out that a) he had Down Syndrome, and b) he would need three open heart surgeries by the time he reached the age of one. I cried a lot that week. Not for me, but for my poor baby. Just the thought of this little 5-pound baby enduring things I?d never had to face: surgery, hospitalization, challenges in learning, growing. Being different, being retarded, being handicapped. During that week, my beloved sister, while saying "you can?t deal with this alone", literally moved us from Chicago to Detroit, with all we could carry. In one fell swoop, I went from being a professional woman with her own home to a single mother living with her parents. And as I sat on the back porch, on an unseasonably warm February day, I heard a still, small voice say, ?To whom much is given, much will be required.? Luke 12:48.

I know the Lord was telling me that He specifically chose me for this awesome task, and that this special anointing was an act of trust. My family was totally equipped to deal with Jeremiah?s challenges: my oldest sister a doctor, my middle sister a Waldorf teacher, and my brother who home-schooled his children. It was a moment in time, when my spirit was awakened, and I knew that it was going to be a sweet, sweet journey. So, off we went. To the cardiologist, the pediatrician, the cardiovascular surgeons. Always on our way to Children?s Hospital for a visit.

My first Mother?s Day, in May of 1997, was spent sitting in the waiting room after Jeremiah?s first open heart surgery, waiting anxiously for his recovery. I knew the rest would have to be better than this. From one casual conversation about Jeremiah?s surgery at my newly found church, I received a multitude of calls, visits and letters from church members. What astonished me most was the deacon who showed up in the surgical waiting room at 6:00 AM on the day of Jeremiah?s operation to help us pray. Wow! I had never ever known such support! The initial visit was followed by daily visits from various church members, who introduced themselves, and prayed with me and my family. For the next 25 days, Jeremiah remained in the Intensive Care Unit, and never ?came to?. The surgeons finally decided they?d better go in and rearrange things back to the original design. (That?s why we call it Jeremiah?s ?designer heart.?) After it was all over, the surgeons pulled me aside, one by one, and told me it was my Faith that had brought him through. Faith. That I didn?t even know I had. Strength. That came from the Spirit deep down inside; an unknown place within. Courage. To know that no matter what happened to my little 6-month old son, God had a plan. After it was all over, and our doctor visits had been reduced to once a year (like everyone else?s), I remember thinking that the rest of my children would be a breeze!

?For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord. Plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you a future with hope.? Jeremiah 29:11

As I continue on this journey, I see the anointing of my son, for he was chosen to teach us how to pray and praise the Lord with joy! I learn so much from him when I watch him, when I listen to his ?sermons,? pacing up and down the living room floor, and when I see him humbly fold his hands each night to prepare for prayer. I am still in awe that his stewardship was entrusted to me. I have no regrets, no remorse, nor was I ever plagued by the ?why me?? scenario. I knew, from the start, that Jeremiah was a special miracle, a special blessing, delivered from heaven in the cutest little package. Since that time, life is all about the challenges of single motherhood and the advocacy of fighting for a decent special education. Jeremiah is especially strong-willed, and needs an extreme amount of discipline. But every now and then, there?s that special moment, when he reaches out his arms to say ?hug me Mommy?, when all defenses fall, and I yield to his irresistible charm. Yes, Jeremiah has an extra chromosome on every cell of his body. That chromosome is full of mischief, drama, intensity, willfulness, but mostly, that chromosome is filled with love.